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Astreon152~1Y
"Another suggested that by going to various things I'll improve my self-esteem, which in my experience is what kind-hearted but not-themselves-mentally-ill people assume is the root cause of any kind of personal struggles, which I find frustrating because that's not the issue for me. The stuff I make gives me a sense of personal value; the social anxiety I have about interacting with people comes more from a negative/fearful view of people in general, seeing them as tribalistic brutes who cast out anyone perceived to be abnormal for the sake of ensuring the safety of the tribe".

I'm perplexed: you often depict how "awkward" you feel when doing basic social interactions, like getting on the bus. Isn't this akwardness partly due to a lack of self-esteem ? Not with regard to your objective value, but to your relative value ?
I'm struggling to explain, but it seems to me as if you fear what other people might think of you; so, if you had a stubbornly positive opinion of yourself, wouldn't this fear, which you yourself know is mostly unfounded (as in, it's what your project on others, not what they actually think of you), not manifest itself ?

Is there really no link at all between how one esteems themselves and how one perceives their own social value ?
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Tobias 1099~1Y
The awkwardness for me comes from an acute awareness of my inexperience combined with a desire not to inconvenience or annoy people because I don't want to be inconvenienced or annoyed myself. With something like getting on the bus, my fear would be doing something wrong in a way that'd hold up people who were waiting, or making them uncomfortable by behaving in a way that's alien due to my inexperience.

It's not that there's no link between 'self-esteem' and self-perceived social value, it just bothers me when people assume it's the sole cause, like when people see someone odd and assume autism, because how else could anyone possibly be odd? I find it to be a frustrating oversimplification.

(Also I don't have a high degree of 'self-esteem', I just don't see it as the primary issue that I face because there are several other more relevant ones.)
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